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J.P. Doodles

J.P. Doodles


Rogersville
THE BOOKEND: A Damsel in Distress .. continued

Dear Readers,

Howdy! How are ya’ll today? I’m happy and good. A local videographer here in Greene County wants to film me telling two funny stories for a storytelling festival.

I am excited, all I really have to do is think of two silly and ridiculous things that I have done.

Easy as pie!

Well, last week I told you all that I would tell another damsel in distress story so here it goes, every bit of it is true!

This happened last winter when I was the legal assistant and office manager for a prominent attorney in the historic district of Greenville Tennessee. I’ll call the attorney, “Buddy.” He is an old friend of mine for at least 24 years, and my personal attorney.

The office is in a 120-year-old beautiful brick building. The ceilings are vaulted up at least 14-15 feet. The office is huge. The room for clients is where you first walk into the building with my office directly behind it. Then there is another room, a long hallway, the conference room, then the intern’s office, and finally at the end of the building the attorney’s office. The place is gorgeous and HUGE.

As I was basically working two jobs in one, most evenings I was working at the office long after the intern and Buddy were gone home for the evening. I would lock the door after they left and get back to work on tons of paperwork. I loved the peace and quiet. The only problem is usually with me around the quiet doesn’t last a whole lotta time.

When I hired on, Buddy decided that I was too sweet and kind for some of his clientele or previous clientele. He tried giving me lessons on how to cuss out someone who might come into the office with a grudge or mad as fire over the way his case went in court. I just did not want to cuss. I refused to cuss. It’s just not nice. He even offered me a hundred-dollar bill to practice cussing. That just further offended my sensibilities. So, Buddy decided this damsel in distress needed a gun for protection. Oh Lord!

He gave me lessons in how to shoot the gun. I was terrified, and politely declined gun lessons at first until he explained there may be situations come up where my life might be in danger. So, I paid closer attention to the instructions. It was a little tiny gun; I think it was a 22-caliber. I kept it in a drawer handy in my desk.

One dark evening I was engrossed in the billing process, which the Tennessee Board of Professional Responsibility monitors. I was always nervous and preoccupied doing the billing. I was in the office alone and had forgotten to lock the front door. Then I heard a noise in the back toward Buddy’s office.

The street was dark outside with the Old English lamp posts glowing. It was then that I realized I had not locked the door. I was gripped with fear. This was it! This was the moment Buddy had always said would happen! I was alone in the office with an evil criminal!! There wasn’t even time to call 911.

I stealthily opened my drawer and got out the little gun. I was shaking all over as I crept silently down the long dark hallway holding the gun. As I passed each office I would look inside. No criminal. As I got to the last office, Attorney Buddy’s office I held my breath. I had to be tough. I had to be strong. I wasn’t feeling real tough, but I was trying. The office light was on and I knew I hadn’t left it on. I came up to the French doors that went to the office, I hollered, “Who is in there??!!”

And then I heard him, Kenny ... Attorney Buddy’s 17-year old son. I immediately put the gun down and went into the office. I said, “Kenny!! You scared me to death!! I thought a criminal was in here!” Kenny said, “I said ‘hi’ to you as I came by your office.”

I never heard him because the Board of Professional Responsibility and I were doing the billing. Gosh almighty, talk about a possible nightmare situation. And I love Kenny, I used to babysit him when he was two, back before he became a big strapping football star for the Greeneville Devils.

I was pretty shook. And I decided guns and I were just not a match. Lord help!

Kenny and I laugh about it now, I’m glad he has a sense of humor about it.

I resigned soon after because the work was too hard on my heart since I have heart conditions. I’ll stick with column writing because, so far, I don’t need a gun for that.

This damsel in distress will have to look for someone else to rescue me.

Until next time, have a good week, and have a literary week!


Rogersville
MY VIEW: Trump administration strikes major blow for America's unborn

I want to say a heartfelt public THANK YOU to President Donald Trump and — if you can believe I am writing this — to the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals.

You who read my columns regularly know that I am a pro-lifer who believes that abortion for the sake of convenience is morally wrong, unconstitutional, and should be illegal except in those rare cases where the life of the mother is in danger.

I will unashamedly defend that belief until I no longer have a breath left in my body.

My heart cries for the more than SIXTY MILLION unborn children who have been slaughtered since Roe v. Wade became the law of the land in 1973.

SIXTY MILLION babies. And yes, they ARE babies, NOT blobs of tissue, fetuses or whatever some ignoramuses may choose to call them to create a smokescreen to cover up the fact that they are living human beings from the moment of conception.

It’s approaching the number of souls who perished in WWII, and amounts to the total population today of the states of Wyoming, Alaska, Vermont, North Dakota, South Dakota, Delaware, Rhode Island, Montana, Maine, New Hampshire, Hawaii, Idaho, West Virginia, Nebraska, New Mexico, Kansas, Mississippi, Arkansas, Nevada, Iowa, Utah, Connecticut, Oklahoma, Kentucky and Oregon, with the District of Columbia tossed in.

That’s more than the folks who live today in HALF of the states.

Let that number sink in.

Does that not send a cold chill up your spine?

One of the precepts embodied in the U.S. Declaration of Independence is the right of all Americans to LIFE, and Biblical truth teaches that LIFE begins at conception. God says in His word that he knew us while we were still in our mothers’ wombs, even though that fact, by their own admission, was “above the pay grade” of many former U.S. Presidents and liberal, pro-choice justices who have dominated the Supreme Court for the past five decades.

The pro-abortion argument that it is all about “choice” and someone’s “rights” is a bunch of left-wing, liberal looney-tune hogwash when compared to what a Higher Authority says.

I wonder ... what about the “rights” of those unborn babies?

Where is his/her “choice” in the matter?

Well, last week, a chain of events set into motion months earlier by President Trump and pro-life members of Congress (including our own Tennessee Senator Marsha Blackburn! — THANK YOU, TOO, MARSHA!!) came to a head, one that, literally and figuratively, rattled to its core one of the largest provider of abortions in the U.S. today, Planned Parenthood.

In an eyebrow-raising astonishing ruling in June, the normally liberal 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals lifted a nationwide injunction that had prevented the Trump administration from enforcing the so-called “Title X Gag Rule”, which mandated that participants in the federal family planning program would henceforth be prohibited from referring their patients for abortions.

As part of that “gag” rule, providers can still talk about abortion, they just can’t tell a client where to get one. It also requires that tax dollars received from that Title X program be accounted for separately from funds used for abortion purposes, calls for abortion counseling to be declared “optional” instead of standard practice, and puts strict limits on which staff members can talk about abortion with patients.

Those providers that continue to receive federal funding must, by March of next year, separate their office space and examination rooms from those facilities where abortions are done.

Well, whatdaya know, on Monday of this week, Planned Parenthood said that it is pulling out of the Title X program rather than abide by the new Trump administration rule.

Whooohooo!

If that ain’t a red-letter day for unborn innocents, I don’t know what is!

Now, understand, the 9th Circuit is still mulling a lawsuit by PP seeking to overturn the “gag” rule, but, in the meantime, that normally far-left “pro-choice”-leaning three-judge panel has said the administration can move forward with enforcement of the “gag rule”, which, in my mind, is a pretty dang good indicator that the Trump administration should win on the merits of the case.

Oh, they will never admit it but if I were a betting man, I’d wager that there were hissy fits, hysterical screaming, pounding on tables, and gnashing of teeth in corporate boardrooms of abortion providers nationwide after all of this hit the fan, because, make no mistake, what the 9th Circuit did was (even if temporary) hand President Trump one of the biggest victories in the past 40 years for the pro-life movement.

A spokesperson for PP said on TV the other night that many low-income women “who rely on Planned Parenthood”, will “delay or go without care.”

The federal tax dollars that PP gets amounts to only four percent or so of its annual budget, so please, don’t give me that lame B.S. excuse.

Most every “health service” (except abortion) that PP provides for women is available at county health departments in every state in the country, free of charge, so tell me how this is depriving ANY person of ANY necessary health service?

Make no mistake about it ... abortion is an ugly, sick, bloody industry ... a very lucrative, high-dollar industry that results in the deaths of more than 4,000 babies every DAY in America.

That is one precious baby lost EVERY 20 SECONDS.

And you can rest assured that those involved will fight tooth and nail to protect it, so this isn’t over yet ... they won’t go down without a fight.

And yes, we will have to wait to see what the 9th Circuit’s final ruling is, but for now, anyway, I’m celebrating this as some of the best news I’ve heard in years, even though it may be only temporary.

President Trump, during the 2016 campaign, was a vocal opponent of giving tax dollars to groups that provide abortions, and he promised, if elected, to do something about it.

And do something he has.

ANOTHER PROMISE KEPT, so THANK YOU and GOD BLESS YOU, President Donald J. Trump!!!!

That’s my view.